Marissa Ward is the only reason I have this.
"What I really want, deep down, is to open my door and see nothing but a black void there, a deathless, endless abyss. And I'll know then that the world has gone away and that I'll never have to worry about it or puzzle over it again. I flirt with the fantasy that the abyss IS right outside my door, but I know that it's not true. I'm not that lucky."
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